3 Times Your Teen Will Talk

Parents everywhere love to complain about their lock-jawed, teen offspring. I’m not one of them. I survived round one of The Crying Years and I, for one, was more than ready when he subsided into nonchalant silence. I loved it when he disappears into his room or the bathroom for hours on end. I’ve spent 17 years listening to his voice, I’m good. These tips are for the rest of you. These three times are pretty much guaranteed to bring on the talk.IMG_1422

Your teen will always need to talk to you if you are rushing to the car. Whether it’s a warning light that flashes in his eyeball like a dying Terminator or just the sound of a door opening, your teen will have something desperate to impart. Yup, might be the fact you are out of Oreos, could be that he needs a suit for prom this weekend, or perhaps he’s just hoping you have time to stop at 5 Guys  for his favorite specially made burger. I’ve learned to pad my departures by a few minutes to allow him to wander by with his special requests. I like hearing a mostly grown boy say, “Thank you, mommy.”

Another vital time to plan for almost-adult conversation is any time you are alone. There is nothing like a Saturday morning with the girls still gone on sleepovers, and just me, my coffee, and my computer, to bring out the Hi Dottie in my teen. As I wait for my coffee mug to be filled, I’ll feel a head coming to rest on my shoulder. That isn’t the start of the conversation. After he’s made himself a bowl of cereal in my eight cup mixing bowl, turned on his PS4, and plugged his headphones into his controller, I sit down at my computer but don’t bother booting it up. As soon as I’m seated, the questions begin.

What are you doing today?

Where is everybody?

Can you tell the girls to be this quiet every weekend?

There’s a pause, but I don’t pick up my mug, I know he’s not finished yet. I scroll idly through a news feed. The part where he tells me his plan is about to begin.

“I was thinking I’d go to the lake today with Dyl an his parents. They’re going to camp but I’d just go up and back today.”

I nod, “Okay, that sounds good.”

“I was at Dvorak and saw a car that would be a good one for me. It’s a Mercedes C-class, I think it’s around $20,000.”

I look back at him, sprawled on the couch. “You can have yours after I get mine.”

“You don’t like Mercedes.” He says.

“Exactly.” I agree.

He rolls his eyes, putting his headphones on.

The one other time a teenager is guaranteed to want to chew the fat is when you are so exhausted off your ass you’d have a hard time identifying him as your child. That’s right, 0 dark thirty. If you really want to know what’s going on in that head, this is when you’re going to hear it. In fact, just last night I got an ear full from my own teen. At 2:45AM.

You read it right.

In the wee hours of last night, my son decided to ask my opinion on him getting a “small tattoo of a soccer ball or something, on his leg.”

“Really?” I don’t think I sounded as blurry as I felt. “Why?”

He then took the next fifteen, twenty minutes to explain that he thought it would be fun. Here where we live you can get one at 16 with a parent’s consent. He’d been talking about it with his best friend Dylan who also thought it was cool. “Britt freaked out though. She said if I did that she wouldn’t go out with me anymore. What the heck? I think she’s totally overreacting.”

“Totally. Overreacting.” I say, wondering if I heard him right.

“So, what do you think?”

“I think you’ll be 18 in October. That gives you some time to study up on tattoos and decide what you want to do. You’re dad will not be down with this at all. Also, you should think about placement and being able to cover it up for work or other places. I expect you’ll read about the dangers of it too.”

“Yeah, you know I’ll do that stuff. But what do you think about it?”

I glance at the atomic clock on the wall above the computer reading 3:05AM. “Did I tell you about the time, in Hawaii, when I drove Jen to get her ankle tattoo? I was in college; I was curious; I also didn’t want to do something I’d regret later….”






A Request

In late May of this year, Sue posted about the Liebster Awards. Here’s where I’ll admit I have no idea what all these awards I see are about, don’t know who starts them, and honestly don’t really give them a second thought.

That said, SueBC very kindly commented that she would like to simply read my answers and no need to do all the other stuff. I filed that bit away, saving the handy list of questions for a rainy, lazy summer day. Which today is. Here we go Sue…


What is the best movie you have seen in the past year?

Wonder Woman without a doubt. Though Thor Ragnarok has yet to be released or The Last Jedi…I’ve been waiting for Wonder Woman and I was not disappointed!662e5bb4fb7a33893e23e7b6012ab274


What is the most memorable live theatre and/or concert experience you’ve had in the past year?

LOL…..do you really have to ask? I’ve never been to a concert, like a band or Garth Brooks or anything like that, and we don’t get much Broadway here, so I’m going to go with the only live theatre I went to last year. My mom is rolling in her grave!  4


What is the best book you’ve read in the past year?

Well a quick scroll through my Kindle shows me lots of self-help titles this year. Blah. One interesting little gem has pinged my radar several times. Joey W Hill’s Branded Sanctuary.  I don’t know if it’s the panic-stricken nights of the delightful heroine Chloe or the quiet, steadfast, sizzling sex appeal of Brendan, I find myself paging through this story incredibly often.

Chloe has always been a creature of joy and laughter. Since a brutal attack nearly a year ago, the trauma she experienced has gotten worse. She has started hiding from her life, even putting up walls between herself and those she cares about most. During a panic attack one night, she impulsively calls a number that she’s had for many months. Chloe met Brendan at her boss’s wedding. With confidence and seduction, he easily steps into the role of helping her manage her fear. By the end of the long call, they’ve indulged in some serious flirtation and mind-blowing phone sex—and she’s feeling things she’s buried for too long.
The problem is that Brendan is the perfect male submissive—and Chloe isn’t wired for the D/s lifestyle. While their attraction is undeniable, Chloe doesn’t know if she can be everything Brendan needs. As a submissive, Brendan would never ask her to be something she’s not—even if it will break both of their hearts to turn away from how they feel about each other.

Joey’s been doing new covers but I love this old one so if you’re tempted to read, click here for the new cover kindle version.



What is your favourite photo of the past week on your mobile phone and are you willing to share it?

My foot warmer when I’m writing. This was a time she snuck up on the bed for a little Sunday nap. Little Luna.



What is your favourite photo ever of your favourite actor or actress?


What songs are at the top of your playlist right now?

Some of these really show my age….

Can’t Stop the Feeling – Justin Timberlake

This is what you came for – Calvin Harris

Cheap Thrills – Sia

I surrender – Billy Gillman

I drove all night – Celine Dion


What is the most recent TV show that you binge-watched?

Last Tango in Halifax

LOVE LOVE Loved it! I adore watching Nicola Walker and I’ve never forgiven Spooks for killing her off in the bleeping last (second to last?) episode.


What time of day do you usually write and/or blog and why?

My brain lights up at 3pm but I don’t usually get to write till after dinner…..dang kids.


Does your avatar have special significance and if so, what is that significance?

My avatar is a picture of me from two summers ago. It does have special meaning to me. It’s one of two selfies that I took late one night in bed. I’d had my hair cut and gone to the work of curling it and decided it should be documented! They were taken for a specific person and when I look at them I see how blasted happy I am. The quality isn’t amazing (pre-iphone) but I consider them pictures of my soul. Here is the other.




In your real life, how open are you about the fact that you have a blog?

Not very.

I struggle writing if I get too wound up in who’s reading. I do have some family members that read the blog and sometimes it ties me up a bit. It’s a battle I keep fighting.

What are the boundaries for you in terms of how much of your real life you share on your blog?

I think that if you read my blog you know quite a bit more about me than anyone who actually knows me, bar one or two people. I feel quite at home being myself here. What I generally won’t share here is anything relatively current about my kids, my political views, and anything very religious. Though I know I have ranted a bit about the way I was raised, I’m not interested in blogging about religion.

Hm, why am I blogging? lol


Hot Hot Summer

I can tell from the sluggish nature of a lot of blogs that summer has well and truly arrived. We’ve all decamped to the nearest water feature and ……


well, that’s what the girls are doing.

Along with a little of this.


I am doing this.


With quite a bit of this, on the side.


I’ll also admit to being glued to this like there’s no tomorrow.


It’s my summer reading book stack, my track down the boy app, my where is the closest ice cream map. Amazing freaking tool.

Ahhh, Summer!


Independence Day

With genuine apology to Caty and Helen! This just made me giggle.

In general, I don’t talk, tweet, post, or blog about politics in America.

I do my civic duties, I try to be the best member of society I know how, and I always take my turn and vote my conscience.

I am proud to be an American. I love my country, and the blessings she has surrounded me with. I love the opportunities that abound here, for me, and my children. I love the beauty of this country, the hope it embodies. I feel truly blessed to call the United States of America my home.

Happy Independence Day!